MOOD'S WINGS:Unshed tears

Lay in bed,cant sleep
pictures 'racin' past me
in my head,'track-meet'
need an open heart surgery
no dagger's in an arm's reach
nor a weapon in my armoury
god i need a pharmacist
or my virgin shot of gin
never woulda thought of this
but tonight,i wanna smoke a cig
just anything,
to see some' burning
on the outside of me
but no vices-to keep me at bay
not suicidal-but keep me away,
from society,
I fuckin love my sobriety
cos 'darkness' provides me
the strength of defiance see,
it seems so-'bright'-to-me
man my soul-cries-to-me
ever so-quiet-ly
but i wont let it die-on-me
cos though nothin's in my control
i gotta be the one to console-
me,I aint gotta front yo
I'm fucked up n then some mo'
been chewin this poisonous gumball
for months now,
cant swallow
maybe,I was goin gung-ho
over some dumb-ho
Karma's a slut? NO
baby u deserve to be fallow
cant let you be the edge off
of which i fell off
Plus this aint a tell all
You damn well know,what went wrong
so repent yo,
its clear you should
like you always feared u would
tell you the truth,
these are my last unshed-tears for you